Balance

"Some days you eat salads and go to the gym, Some days you eat cupcakes and refuse to put pants on. It's called balance" 

It's been awhile since I've been on here. It's funny because before I posted this morning I went back and read some old posts. Seems like every 3 months or so I am here writing about how I fell off and life got in the way. That's just how my life is without balance. Without rhyme or reason. I never really understood "balance" before recently. And to be honest even recently I just started to spend more time on it. I have heard over and over again that balance is the key to life. That finding balance is super important and that if you don't have balance it is the reason life can seem so chaotic. 

I have three jobs, a dog, finances, the gym, meal prepping, macro-nutrients to follow, deadlines for work and for things coming up (those are a surprise!) and every time I go to write all of those things out, I think to myself "how the hell am I supposed to balance all of that in one week"? Never mind the fact that some of that stuff needs to get done in one day! 

I recently watched a TED talk (My favorite!!) about balance and life and it blew my mind. Gave me that "ah-ha!" moment. (I'll post the video in another post after this one!) In this TED talk, Dan Thurmon talks about life and balance and what it means to be balanced. He simply states that no one ever is. Thurmon believes that in times of being unbalanced, we learn the most. We are forced to be on our toes and forced to stretch to new lengths and measures. He also states that in those unbalanced moments we find our purpose. Thurmon used juggling as an example to explain his reasoning's. When juggling, he states that there is always a pattern. However, when you add a fourth, fifth or even sixth ball the pattern changes. In our lives, we come accustomed to patterns and routines. Whenever something new gets thrown into that, we change our patterns. Dan Thurmon then ended his talk, but bringing everything back to an infinity sign. Watching the balls being juggled into the air, they didn't look balanced. There didn't seem to be a distinct pattern. But there was and it was unique to the number of balls he had in his hand. The infinity sign is ever-going. It doesn't stop. Thurmon states that this is our lives. Our balance. It is ever changing and should never be just one pattern for the rest of our lives because that is not reality. Life happens, we adjust. That is our balance and that is okay that it seems so "off balance" at times. 

So you can imagine how much this blew my mind. Lol, literally! My life is every-changing and it is about to be even worse. I am going to have to make some big adjustments that I felt I wasn't ready for. That being because I felt so "off balance". Has anyone ever attempted to make a routine for the week? And you feel so accomplished on Sunday nights because you feel ready to attack the week head-on... Then something happens on Tuesday and the week has gone to shit? This is my life every week! And I struggle with it. I would meal prep everything on Sunday, pull out my calendars and plan out my week. Then Tuesday comes and I forget a meal, or have to add something to my schedule, or I forgot to add in a bill I needed to pay. And then I get this attitude of " well this week is shot, I'll try again next week". 

Anyone at all do this same thing? Because its a pattern for me. A terrible one lol. But I challenge all of you as I challenge myself this month. To roll with the "off balance". Be okay with changing up the pattern, find the purpose in it. Feel the chaos and embrace it. I do believe that life isn't meant to be lived in uniform. There is so much that goes on to think that everything can just be the same. And if anyone knows chaos, It's me. I purposefully go out and search for it! There is something about being off balance and knee deep in chaos that pulls me in. (And guys, I am just having this realization as I am writing this). The unknown, scares the living day lights out of me. Makes me question my entire being. But I chase it. Why? I constantly find things to mess up my patterns and routines and I dive into it. Why? Honestly, because that's where I am reminded of who I am as a person. I am reminded of my purpose. I find who I am in those moments of chaos and stress. And I think I stress myself out because I dwell on it instead of accepting it and growing from it. 

Balance is never something someone accomplishes. Its not something you work for, obtain, and live happily ever after. Balance is something you constantly put effort into. Balance is constantly changing, and we have to be okay and willing to change with it. Otherwise, we are going to lose sight of who we are, what our purpose is, and maybe even worse... our motivation to be the best version of ourselves.